Friday, January 30, was "Gotcha Day." The second anniversary of our becoming a family through adoption. After some frustrations at work, I came home to a son who was tired and miserable. He had napped a litle but not enogh to feel rested so he was more demanding than ususal. He had soy pizza for dinner and Sharon and I had scrambled tofu (better than it sounds) and played the Wiggles game with him.

I love my family and get deramy with the idea of it. He's a nice boy and I wonder what he will be like as a man. What am I teaching him now? I don't know. I know he sees me working but what else is he seeing. I hope he sees the responsible one. The man who holds together responsibility and the family's relationship with the bigger world well.
- posted by Unknown @ 6:23 AM

 
I'm tired and depressed and need rest.

It snowed last night andwe had about 8-10 inches when I awoke. Jack was up at 3:30 and Sharon took the early shift letting me sleep until I aoke at 5. I was still tired but realized she wasn't next to me so went looking for her. Jack was watchinmg tv and she was lying in his bed, exhausted. So she went to bed and I took over. I'm better if I can get a slow start to the day and that didn't happen. As a matter of fact, just as I got out of the shower, I was asked to shovel snow, something I said I wanted to do last night, was told not to do for fear of waking Jack. And now that he was asleep, I'm asked to do it. So I lost all my time this morning, rushed through breakfast, mised my train and caught the next one.

I got to my office and the guy I'm coaching who has a methodical applicant who is not being committal to a job offer, starts putting pressure about how I should handle the deal. I handle my desk all day bt by the afternoon, I was very tired. In retrospect, I'm depressed and annoyed by the multitude of intrusions.

I didn't bargain for perpetual exhaustion in my life but that's what I'm getting. Tonight, I got home, and while I played with Jack, I was eating a dinner that I couldn't enjoy becauise it was described critically and Jack is trying to play a game with me.

I was awakened from my nap on the train by a call.

I don't like today.

And I made someone happy by invoting them to co-lead an NWTA in New York in October.
- posted by Unknown @ 9:07 PM

 
I spent yesterday with Jack while Sharon did a retreat in Huntington. It was a fun day. We played in the AM; watched a little tv, I choppped ice from in froint of the house (it was too cold to let him come out) and then went to the aviation museum before coming home and Sharon joining us for dinner. It was fun watching him explore the planes at the aviation museum on LI. He would run form plane to plane, climb in a cockpit ask me to sit next to him and pull the stick, flip buttons, whatever. He went up and down the stairs. He had a ball. Although it was not an easy time getting him to sleep, it was a fun day.
- posted by Unknown @ 7:47 AM

 
The end of the day is usually hard for me. I'm up at 5:30 to read an online newspaper, do some yoga and have some breakfast. I usually meditate on the train in. I arrive at work at 8:45 and juggle between calls, emails, business development, work, MKP and the new business I'm developing. I mentor and teach. I see patients. I interview. I'm on the go from the time I arrive until I leave.

And then my real challenge starts. Coming home, I catch a quick bite and relieve Sharon and play with my son. Most of the time, Sharon puts him to bed. Some nights I do. I crash at the end of the day.

A night like Wednesday is special. Although it's hard for me to glide into relaxation, I love it. I can eat without being interrupted by someone wanting my attention. The food is adult food (Thank you, Thierry).

I don't drink anymore or smoke. I lost someone who did. I won't do it any more.

So, thank you all for making my playing possible Wednesday night.

Yesterday, I took off and took Jack to school and replaced Sharon as the parent during class. It was so much fun with him and all the other kids.

And today, I got a call, that Jack had peed in the potty (half was on the floor, but there was half in the potty).

My life is pretty damn good.

- posted by Unknown @ 11:05 AM

 
It has been a very busy week for me.

I've been alone because Sharon and Jack are in Florida so I went out with Peter for dinner only to get zapped at the end of the night with regular coffee, instead of the decaf I ordered. It affected me for two days.

Wednesday with my group, I was out late and realized how much I love sitting with them in a circle.

Today, the day started with temperature at 1 degree and windchill to 20 below zero. I froze until I could get on a train (The 7:19 was 25 minutes late so I took it to Jamaica and changed to a New York train rather than wait in the cold).

And once I got to work, I was swamped from the moment I arrived until 4PM. I could wind down then and began to. Came home and got the snow off the two cars and went to the store and home.

And now at 9PM, I just did a debrief of an interview. It's a long day.

And I'm happy that Sharon and Jack are going to be home tomorrow. As much as I;ve enjoyed my quiet time here, I'm looking forward to holding Sharon and holding Jack.
- posted by Unknown @ 9:38 PM

 
It was a good work week and an OK personal one. With Sharon and Jack in Florida, I've had a very strong open to the new year. I've scheduled a lot of interviews. This amazes me because normally after two long weekends like we've had (Christmas and New Years on a Thursday resulted in two weeks of nothing), we walked in io Monday and the office was humming almost immediately.. I scheduled a bunch of interviews with candidates I found since returning from the holiday. It wouldn't have happened if I went to Florida with Sharon.

On the personal front, I didn't go to group on Wednesday because I was too tired from being up early to put them on a flight; Thursday, I met a mentee who wanted to end our mentor-mentee relationship and last night I worked. This weekend, I have to prep a speech I'm giving at Toastmasters, do some work on my new website idea and start to prep for business and personal taxes.

Gott ahave some fun, too!

- posted by Unknown @ 7:24 AM

 
Sharon and Jack are in Florida while I'm in New York. I've been working hard and I miss them.

Yesterday, I heard that somoene who worked in my office in 2003 for several months committed suicide. They had been evicted from their apartment, persuaded the doorman to let them back in to get a few possessions and then jumped out the window leaving a suicide note.

An older woman, I didn't think that she was worth hiring but, it appears that by giving her a job, her life might have been extended longer. What I don't see sometimes in the heat of the moment was the opportunity for generousity.

I'm still not fully rested from my early AM Wednesday when I had to rise at 3AM to get Sharon and Jack to the airport. This weekend, there is a lot to do with my new Toastmasters speech coming up, an oportunity to prepare myself for the acountant for taxes and work thaht I n do for my new website ahead.

And I want to have some fun!
- posted by Unknown @ 6:27 AM